What I have learning about screwing up and God’s forgiveness.
Do you ever blow it? Like completely blow it? I just had an episode of losing all control recently.
I instructed my child to do something. He didn’t obey and then when I questioned him about it he lied. He lied to my face. Me, his mother. I then heard him telling his older brother exactly what he had done.
Not sure if I should share all the details. Kids are kids. They do strange things. They do gross things.
Well, this falls in the category of both. Strange and gross. It also involved my living room. To be particular, a potted plant, my banister, a bookshelf and the carpet.
You’ll have to fill in the details in our mind. You may get it right. Possibly not. Sorry. I just can’t even type it.
This is the part where I lose control of my emotions and my words. I was angry. He knew I was angry.
He looked like a scared puppy. But I couldn’t stop those words. Wait. I could. I just chose not to.
I even looked at the other kids and yelled, “How could he do that to me? Lie straight to my face! I don’t get it!”
I knew my anger was wrong. But at that moment I felt totally justified by what he had done.
I walked away. I bawled a bucket of tears. I was totally wrong. I knew immediately. That’s were the tears came from. Remorse.
Not only did I feel it for my child. I felt it as a child. A child who hurt the Father.
How can I claim to be who I am and still react in that way? I asked forgiveness. I prayed. I thanked God.
Thank goodness he forgives.
I screwed up God. ‘I know’ He says, ‘but I forgive.’ Psalm 103:12 “as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.”
I screwed up….
but I’m not a screw up.
I am Loved.
So are You.
Melanie
If you’re new to my blog head over here to read about my struggle with selfishness. https://gatherforbread.com/?s=selfishness
Alfred Still Sr. says
“Another reason I never leave you nor forsake you. Please be sure to tell your little brother, exactly as you told your older brothers and sisters, about your side of this experience. This way he may be more encouraged to share the truth the next time he (screws up) as you term it”, says THE CREATOR as he wipes clean the slates of yours and your brother’s ( whom he gave to you to nurture for a season and you know as your son). Thanks for sharing the experience and the wisdom. love and peace.
Melanie says
I love the feeling of a clean slate. He’s so good to us!
Alfred Still Sr. says
From creators’ forum” Something to ponder”. Are we followers of JESUS or brothers and sisters of JESUS? John 20 thru 26. JESUS first prayed for the disciples prior to verse 20. Verses 20 through 26 JESUS’s prayer is for those who shall believe on JESUS through the sanctified word of GOD, which is truth. His prayer for us is that we all may be as one, as Father is in Him, and He is in Father, may we too be one in Father and Him, that the world may believe that Father has sent Him. Also the glory which Father has given Him He has given to us; in order that we maybe one, just as Father and Him are one: And Him in us and Father in Him, in order that we may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that ,Father has sent Him and has loved us, as Father has loved Him. JESUS prays that we be with him where He is in order that we may behold the glory Father has given Him for Father loved Him before the foundation of the world. JESUS goes on to say that the world has not known Father but He and we have known that Father has sent Him. JESUS prays on saying that He has declared to us Father’s name and will continue to declare it: that the love which Father has loved Him with may be in us, and Him in us. The word tells us the righteous shall have their desires granted. JESUS also tells us that who soever shall do the will of Father who is in heaven, is My mother, My sister,My brother. It goes without saying that it is wasted effort to question the righteousness of JESUS. love and peace. Seeking to grow in the grace and knowledge of Father.