Celebrating our 16 year Anniversary Together (Not Wedded Bliss>
We’re celebrating (our way) but it’s not all roses, chocolates, fanfare and long kisses. Marriage is hard, but we stand true to our covenant because LOVE does that.
*I’m not a marriage counselor or a marriage expert. I am just a married gal with experience living by God’s grace to stay true to the covenant I made and love my man. I’ve made plenty of mistakes. You can read about them here.
Today we celebrate our 16 year anniversary. It’s a day I’m happy about. It’s a day to celebrate.
I haven’t written a post that doesn’t involve food in almost a year. But in light of our anniversary I’m doing it. I’m scared to hit publish or share but I’m being courageous despite my fears. But you all are so kind and I know that there are things I should share. However lately I just don’t take the time to write. So here I go before I chicken out! Thank you for reading. (((hugs)))
Celebrating Marriage is Not About >>>
Anniversaries aren’t celebrating that we have been “So Happy” for the last 16 years.
We haven’t been SO happy for the last 16 years. That would be a lie. But I can say I am fulfilled in my marriage. He brings me a comfort and a joy that no one else on this planet can fill. I can say…. I am “So Thankful”.
It’s not about only being sweet and thoughtful when you feel like it.
That’s the easy thing to do. Who said marriage was easy. No one. And the person that did was lying.
Love is doing: Here I made you coffee even though we fought last night. Love is doing the dishes for her even though you want to sit on the couch. Love is >>> Watching the game with him even though you’d rather read a book. Love speak and love does.
It’s definitely not about presents.
We don’t buy each other anniversary gifts.
- Shouldn’t I just consider it a gift that he is mine and I am his?
- Isn’t it a gift just to see him walk through the door at the end of a long day?
- Isn’t this the best earthly gift? To have companionship with another for the rest of life. Isn’t that what God saw and created when he made man and woman. He saw that man needed a helper and companion to do life with.
It’s not about I love you, only when you love me back.
There will be times that you and I have to choose to DO love even when it takes everything we have. There have been times I wanted to spit on him but instead I packed his lunch. I’m sure there have been times he’s wanted to curse me out but instead he picks up the phone and calls me.
Celebrating Marriage is About >>>>
Celebrating the failures.
I choose to be glad that we went through rough patches and seasons. Because of those…I know him better. I can trust him more. I realize he’s faithful to me and I am to him even though we went through a difficult time. That’s a reason to celebrate!
Choosing to love even when it’s not given in return.
I say this again. Love is more than just loving in return. Love is giving when it’s not reciprocated. Love is when you expect nothing in return. And not having unrealistic expectations.
Yes, we share a mutual love when we got married and we still do. But every waking moment doesn’t always feel loving. Sometimes those moments just are love. Not feeling love but just plain I will get up again tomorrow and I will serve you and I will choose you because that’s what love does.
Choosing to serve even when you’re tired and weary.
Serving him is one of my life long missions. That’s what you sign up for when you get married. It’s not about being served. It’s about serving. As long as I am doing my best to meet his needs and be his helper….that is love.
Celebrating each other. Choosing to look at the gifts and talents of your spouse instead of their negative characteristics.
I’ve had some very real lessons in this. Instead of focusing on my inability to keep the kitchen counters clean he instead loves that I make him homemade soup.
Instead of me focusing on his lack of interest in running and exercise I instead love that we can enjoy quite conversations on the deck.
Think of the things that inspired love in the first place. And do them. Because Love Does!
In case you haven’t noticed I recently read Bob Goff’s best selling book. Love Does: Discover a Secretly Incredible Life in an Ordinary World
Thanks for being here friends!
Til we meet and eat again,
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Thank you, Melanie, for your honesty and openness! My husband and I have had 17 years of not-so-wedded bliss. 🙂 We’re both so thankful for God’s grace in our lives and His work in our marriage despite our many failures. I hate to think where we’d be today without the hope of the transforming of gospel of Jesus! Happy anniversary!
Thank you friend! 17 years that’s awesome. We’re not far behind! 🙂
I’d hate to think of it too. So thankful for His mercies daily. God is good!